Post by Kim on Jul 26, 2008 22:42:03 GMT -5
WARNING: If you are under the age of 18, you should not be reading this, it will give you nightmares and put you off fanfiction writing for the rest of your natural born life....unless you're like Bella and hook up with Edward, in which case we all know she's going to be a vamp before too long....but I digress.....
I've been writing fanfiction for a number of years now, like many of you, and I've had my fair share of weird emails, strange reviews, and instant messages that just.....yeah, trying to keep it PG-13, but you get my drift. About a month or so ago, I had someone start IMing me on AIM about liking my stories. Fair enough, that's why I post my info so people who have questions about my stuff or just want to chat with me can. But a month or so ago, I had this person, who shall be referred to as The Stalker, pop up one day and start iming me. All was good until The Stalker as me if I wanted to hear about a story that he or she had thought up. I said sure, why not. After all, being a veteran writer, I love fostering new talent. And this, my dear readers, is where I went horribly wrong.
To go into further detail about said story would give you nightmares for the rest of your life. Suffice to say, Tommy and Kimberly were suddenly Kira's parents, Kim had kept Kira from Tommy and never told either of them they were related, Kimberly is kidnapped by mesogog and turned against her child and her long lost love....you get where I'm going with this. It was one walking ball of cliched that made the TK lover in me rebel so badly that I wanted to hunt this person down and strangle them. Being the nice veteran that I am, I kindly pointed out that the story was going to get The Stalker laughed right out of the fandom and that it was a walking cliche. And then they asked for help.
What did I do? I helped. Several conversations later, they had a semi plausible story line, but the TK lover in me, not to mention the DT and Kira lover in me, is still very much against this story. So the person asks me to write it for them. I'm too busy, I tell them. Got way too many of my own projects to work on. So they ask if I know of anyone who would write the story. Somehow, Shawn's name comes up in the conversation. Wishing to spare my big brother, I tell them regretfully, that no, Shawn is busy, has too much to do, when in reality, I'm trying to spare this poor STALKER cause I know Shawn would laugh his ass off and be "HELL NO". Shawn is not a bad person, but I know him well, he has STANDARDS when it comes to TK and that story isn't going to meet them. End of story. So what happens next? The Stalker starts shopping around for authors, and surprisingly, finds one. But said author has only one story to their credit, and it's not even PR at that. So what's bad about that, you ask?
I was just informed that the story, when written is being dedicated to me, for all my help. *sighs as she hears the crickets* Can we say Kim's reputation as a credible writer just went out the door, down the street, dropped into the sewer and drown itself to death? Why yes, yes we can.
And this, my dear readers, is why you must be very careful about your readers and who you speak with, or you will end up with a pink and blue straight jacket like the one that Chris Violette is standing next to me holding, preparing to wrap me in. If this person is here on the board (but I don't think they are) I will only say that I have not used your penname, and I'm sorry, but you're FUCKING CRAZY AS HELL AND IT'S NEVER GOING TO WORK!
And so ends Kim's lesson for the day.
The End.
I've been writing fanfiction for a number of years now, like many of you, and I've had my fair share of weird emails, strange reviews, and instant messages that just.....yeah, trying to keep it PG-13, but you get my drift. About a month or so ago, I had someone start IMing me on AIM about liking my stories. Fair enough, that's why I post my info so people who have questions about my stuff or just want to chat with me can. But a month or so ago, I had this person, who shall be referred to as The Stalker, pop up one day and start iming me. All was good until The Stalker as me if I wanted to hear about a story that he or she had thought up. I said sure, why not. After all, being a veteran writer, I love fostering new talent. And this, my dear readers, is where I went horribly wrong.
To go into further detail about said story would give you nightmares for the rest of your life. Suffice to say, Tommy and Kimberly were suddenly Kira's parents, Kim had kept Kira from Tommy and never told either of them they were related, Kimberly is kidnapped by mesogog and turned against her child and her long lost love....you get where I'm going with this. It was one walking ball of cliched that made the TK lover in me rebel so badly that I wanted to hunt this person down and strangle them. Being the nice veteran that I am, I kindly pointed out that the story was going to get The Stalker laughed right out of the fandom and that it was a walking cliche. And then they asked for help.
What did I do? I helped. Several conversations later, they had a semi plausible story line, but the TK lover in me, not to mention the DT and Kira lover in me, is still very much against this story. So the person asks me to write it for them. I'm too busy, I tell them. Got way too many of my own projects to work on. So they ask if I know of anyone who would write the story. Somehow, Shawn's name comes up in the conversation. Wishing to spare my big brother, I tell them regretfully, that no, Shawn is busy, has too much to do, when in reality, I'm trying to spare this poor STALKER cause I know Shawn would laugh his ass off and be "HELL NO". Shawn is not a bad person, but I know him well, he has STANDARDS when it comes to TK and that story isn't going to meet them. End of story. So what happens next? The Stalker starts shopping around for authors, and surprisingly, finds one. But said author has only one story to their credit, and it's not even PR at that. So what's bad about that, you ask?
I was just informed that the story, when written is being dedicated to me, for all my help. *sighs as she hears the crickets* Can we say Kim's reputation as a credible writer just went out the door, down the street, dropped into the sewer and drown itself to death? Why yes, yes we can.
And this, my dear readers, is why you must be very careful about your readers and who you speak with, or you will end up with a pink and blue straight jacket like the one that Chris Violette is standing next to me holding, preparing to wrap me in. If this person is here on the board (but I don't think they are) I will only say that I have not used your penname, and I'm sorry, but you're FUCKING CRAZY AS HELL AND IT'S NEVER GOING TO WORK!
And so ends Kim's lesson for the day.
The End.
